Wedding guests in front of The Maples Estate farmhouse

How Many Guests Is Normal?

When it comes to your wedding invite list, there is a fine balance between eloping and accidentally inviting hundreds of people. From extended cousins of cousins, to college roommates and old co-workers. So, how do you decide how many guests is too many or too little? At The Maples Estate, our weddings range between 25 and 150 guests.

Though honestly, it’s up to you!! That’s the beauty of your wedding, it’s YOURS and YOU get to decide how you wish to celebrate. However, we know that it can feel super overwhelming with so many decisions to make, so let's dive into some important factors when it comes to setting a guest list.

Budget

I know you don’t want to blow that wedding budget out of the water unless you have unlimited funds coming your way! With wedding costs tied to each one of your guests such as food, drinks, number of tables and chairs, linens, centerpieces, guest favors, transportation etc. setting an ideal guest count and sticking to it, is super important. If you know you have a finite amount of money to spend, this is a great place to start for your guest count. Food and drinks are one of the most expensive line items in your budget and are almost always priced per person.

Say you have a $20,000 budget for food and drink and your caterer quotes $250 per person, you should plan to invite ~80 guests.
Maybe your catering budget is $30,000 and the caterer charges $200 per person, you can invite up to 150 guests.
Hosting a casual gathering with a caterer quoting $75 per person and a food budget of $10,000, you can host ~130 guests.
What about an intimate gathering with a focus on food - $12,000 food budget, $400 per person, that’s 30 guests.

Venue Capacity

Every venue has a guest cap, here at The Maples Estate, (an upstate New York wedding venue with lodging) this is 150 guests. Our cap is set by the size of our parking lot (50 cars) and the amount of tables and chairs we have onsite. We can raise this amount if you are able to rent some additional tables and chairs and arrange a shuttle for some of your guests, however we do set this number in our contract. Every venue will list this number, and while we have some wiggle room here at The Maples Estate due to the flexibility of our outdoor spaces, most venues are capped by the constraints of their event space, staffing, restroom capacities, fire and codes and it’s legally not possible to invite more guests than is listed in the contract. Therefore, this is a great place to set your guest count. When mom and dad are asking to add on your great aunt, their neighbor down the street or your old friend just got a new girlfriend, you might use the venue capacity as an excuse to say no.

Vision and Priorities

Your wedding vision and personal priorities have a huge impact on how many guests you wish to invite. Are you the life of the party who loves to mix and mingle? Maybe you have a huge family that you are super close to or a large friend group that has only grown over the years. Do you want everyone and their brother to be part of your special day? Maybe you are shy in crowds and prefer to celebrate with a smaller group or want a friends only wedding weekend and will celebrate separately with family at a different moment? Maybe you want to stretch your budget across a smaller group so you can throw an over the top weekend wedding experience with incredible food and activities for that special group.

Family Invites, Plus Ones, Kids and Co-workers

We know it’s hard to say no, but sometimes your guest list is a bit too long. It definitely adds up quickly when your parents are adding guests to the list, every guest is allowed a plus one, everyone’s kids are attending the wedding and co-workers are asking for invites. These are some hard and fast rules that can be set as needed. Maybe give your parents each a set number of invites, limit the number of plus ones to specific guests, only invite the flower child and ring bearer or have a no co-workers policy. This will help to reign in the list when it’s feeling overwhelming.

So, now that you have an idea of those important factors to think through, let’s get started. I always suggest making a few different tiers within your guest list. This will give you a good idea of where to cut first in the case you have to.

Quick Tip: Use excel or google sheets so you have a digital list you can update along the way and use later for RSVPs.

List ‘A’ is going to include those people you HAVE to have at your wedding - your direct family members and closest friends.

List ‘B’ is for extended family and additional friends that you would like to celebrate with but it’s not the end of the world if you do not.

List ‘C’ are those additional individuals such as college roommates that you haven’t spoken to in a while, people that invited you to their wedding so you feel you should invite them to yours, co-workers, etc.